For years I never really talked about how old I am. I never lied about it, and if anyone asked me directly I told them, but I didn’t post my age on my birthday and I didn’t bring it up on my own. Then I turned 45 and I finally said it, out loud, on social media. It sounds like such a small thing to write down, but it felt like a big one at the time, so this is the full story of how I got there.
I’m not writing this as advice. It’s just what I decided to do and I’ll explain why. I know this industry well enough to know exactly what brands look at before they say yes to someone, which is why this decision took me years and not days.
I never lied, I just didn’t announce it…I want to be clear about this part because it matters. I never lied about my age. I just never made a point of it. Every birthday came and went without a post saying how old I was turning. I was strategic about it, and I’ll admit that. My whole business is beauty, and in beauty, age is something people have opinions about before they’ve even looked at your work. It’s unfortunate, but it is what it is.
What I was actually scared of…The honest reason was work. I didn’t know if I’d still get the kind of work I was getting, the brand deals and the campaigns, once people knew how old I was. That was a scary thought and it also kind of annoyed me that this is how the industry can make you feel. I’d built my career in a region where I hadn’t seen over 40 beauty anywhere, and I wasn’t sure it was ready for it. So I stayed quiet, and at the time that felt like the safest option.
Why 45 was the year…What changed was remembering who I was actually talking to. My audience is mostly based in the US, and over 40 beauty is probably further along than most places. Not as much as it should be, but still better. I also knew I wouldn’t get that time back. I have my mum’s genes of looking younger than I am, so I’d decided I’d rinse that for as long as I could, and I did. Then somewhere before my 45th birthday I felt ready to be vocal about it. So I said it on my birthday. I’m 45 today.
“I never lied about my age. I just never made a point of it.”
Once I’d said it, some things went quiet and other things got louder, and the brands I thought I’d lose weren’t always the ones I ended up losing. I’ll tell you all of it on the paid side, along with what I’d say to anyone sitting on the same fear right now.
